Welcome to the Anti-Style types series! In this series I am breaking down BAD fashion and sharing actionable tips on how to correct these simple styling mistakes.
In today's video, we are breaking down "Like Me For Me Mary." Mary is above this whole “fashion” thing. She wears whatever she wants (no matter how tattered, ugly, off-putting, and inappropriate it is) and expects you to embrace her regardless. She wants no part of the appearance game, yet wonders why she isn’t where she wants to be in her life.
What I'm Wearing:
Sweater, Victoria Beckham
Boots, Jimmy Choo
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I am a fashion expert, on-camera talent and a premiere personal fashion stylist in Los Angeles. I believe that style is for everyone. I work to educate and empower women through my daily dose of fashion advice, shopping guides and styling tips.
Anti-Style Type: Like Me For Me Mary
I wish there was an option to love this video. I was a little hestitant because I assumed this was a style “shaming” video, but this is not that at all! I appreciate your sense of humor throughout and then shit got real and you talked about the psyche of style and it clicked. Please keep up the awesome content!
I'm giving a shot to fashion lately. I don't think it elevates me intellectually or socially, I think it misleads people, makes me look dumb, and might associate me with the wrong people but that's ok because I turn away from people all the time because none of them matter. I just want high IQ people to contribute to my knowledge, sloppy mad geniuses are my thing. Boring bare faced people are the best because they are vulnerable and honest about their flaws. I've returned to the sociopath life so I can disguise myself now
I just love your attitude in these vids! So refreshing and funny. I did some soul searching recently to try to work out why I had never been satisfied with my style, and why I always failed to look sophistated and sharp. I noticed that having no full time job made me feel inadequate and childish and therefore unworthy of wearing anything formal or even fitted!! Once I realised that I had every right to look polished and put together, I started to nail it 😉 Clothes really can have such an effect on our lives!
I had an abusive mother. My style gives me the sense of freedom. I don't really think that it's a bad thing and that I'm really hurting anyone so much that I should not do things that I like. For me doing crazy things with my style has helped me a lot to gain confidence and independence instead of doing everything according my mother's opinion. I think that a "bad" and "ugly" style is still a style. After all the past shapes us in a certain way. I know that people judge me for having oversized funny t-shirts and green hair. First impression indeed is having a big impact on people. I still think that people should learn to see beyond their first impressions as we can have great stories to tell. Sure not having a presentable style can turn many people away but maybe I'm only interested in the ones that doesn't. I think the most important thing is to have fun with your style, even if it turns people away.
1237 remember this is just her opinion. If you are comfortable with your style and yes it is a style...your personal style... then rock it. I find that “alternative” styles are usually looked down upon if they aren’t cute/ conventional looking. Don’t let it phase you.
The problem is you use very successful women as your what-not-to-do. I think Amy Schumer, for instance, is doing just fine and people actually do like her for herself. Also Ellen and Portia and others whom I have forgotten. Is this really the message you intend to send to other women?
This is my mom! She wears the worst outfits but then gripes about wishing she could wear what she truly wants. I want to tell her she can only get better compared to what she is currently wearing. It's v. frustrating.
oof more like "Lose-the-bitchy-elitism Lauren" ; )
Elitism doesn't look cute on anyone. Maybe my girl Mary is secure in her career and relationships and just wanna wear some comfy shit. Maybe it's laundry day. Mary doesn't owe it to anyone to be a fashion paragon. Clap BACK, Mary!
Lool thats me...I really don't care about what people think. Clothes I love make me feel beautiful. Including old destroyed t shirts. I used to pair them with high waisted diy skirts..I can't wait to go back to wearing those instead of my spitup stained booby flashing longsleeves (cause no time to shave armpits and needing fast boob access)
I get that some people don’t dress as nice as you. But you come across as a really bitchy, snobby fashion whore. Why are you so consumed with people’s outfits? No one is hurting you, so why do you care so much. Your channel so far seems like a community where rich, insecure people can bash others.
I don't get why people choose to watch style videos when they have no style, know the subject is roasting their style, & claim that they don't care about what you have to say but are clearly upset. Like... You didn't HAVE to watch the fashion advice video from the personal stylist... What were you expecting? Ms. Messiah to quit her job & tell everyone that just because they don't care, nobody else should? If you don't CARE about style, fine. But if you're watching a video like this, chances are you want a change, or are at least curious about fashion. Don't be a Sensitive Sally, y'all.
I can relate to the being teased thing & having an aversion to something later. As a child I was forced to wear white orthopedic hard leather saddle shoes to correct my walking with "pigeon toes." I was teased about wearing "baby shoes" & hated having to wear them to school. Fast forward to the 80s when white high top athletic shoes were all the rage & I refused to wear them. I only wore black ones. I told my boyfriend at the time about the whole "baby shoes" thing & he actually drew stripes on his white Adidas high tops because he thought they did look like baby shoes lol. I totally got to him too.
As women/girls we get so many messages & opinions thrown at us about our bodies & how we *should* look, feel,act & dress that it's no wonder we lose track of what truly makes us authentically happy & fullfilled, nevermind what actually looks good & suits our lifestyle as individuals.
I might be a sensitive Sally, but the main message I've got from that video is that people like you for your fashion tastes and for your looks. That's kinda sad imo. I thought 2018 was about supporting each other and feeling good about yourself. People should wear what they want and what they feel good in, but that's just my opinion.
No, the message is that people like you for who you are on the inside, but they *will* make an initial judgement based on how you visually present yourself. It happens in the first few seconds; research has shown this time and time again. No one can help it. You can choose to ignore this reality, or you can make an effort to use it to your advantage.
Not entirely, she said to first attract people to get to know the real you. I can't see someone's good heart from across the room! If someone looks like they just rolled out of bed at 1pm, I don't go out of my way to talk to them because even if I like them as a person they are probably a flakey mess. I don't got time for a flakey mess friend.
This girl just reinforces stereotyping, judgement and cruelty. There needs to be an underlying comedy for this to work and it just comes across as the mean girl at the middle school lunch table. I keep trying to enjoy these videos because the concepts are there, but the viciousness keeps taking me out of it.
How heteronormative and sexist, ableist and classist of you :D wow. Your poor clients, I hope they have enough confidence to know that they are enough, that fashion will never satisfy everyone you meet so wear what you want and what is appropriate for your job and what you're comfy in. Don't listen to these condescending people telling you you are too stupid to know whats good for you. You are enough. ♥
Marys need to realize they aren't going to get ahead in their careers with that attitude about appearance. You're not just representing yourself, you're representing the company. In general, most "don't care about style/fashion" because they either don't have the money or the ability to style themselves so they put on a "I don't give a fuck". This series is pure gold.
This is my favorite of this series. I do a class with soon to graduate surgical techs where I explain to them how they need to dress/ act during interviews and at work. I tell them they have to follow the golden rule... he with the gold makes the rules... in other words- if you do not present yourself prperly, they will figure out a reason NOT to hire you....
The important thing here, i think, is, maybe people "shouldn't" judge by first impressions, but it doesnt matter! It's how our brains work, trying to make sense of the world. It's subconscious, and is not going to change. You are really serving people when you urge them to take ownership of the message they are sending! Good job again.
I think when it comes to hair and makeup I put it in the "too hard basket" (or I lacked time to deal with it!) and opt for a take me for me approach to pretend it doesn't matter, when it does! Completely ruins any effort I put into my outfit! It was the same when I was working long hours in corporate life, and now with two children it feels difficult to dedicate the time. Hats off to anyone who can pull it all together all the time. I'm just trying for a nurturing, consistent skincare routine and decently-presented, flattering clothes at present.
Im all about that with the hair (makeup I can do). I was always pushing hair aside because it takes too long, now Im a mother I have even less time! But I have absolutely come to realize if you don't do at least the hair (skip makeup) it totally ruins your overall appearance.
Love you Lauren for doing this and more importantly explaining the more deep seated stuff because at least for me this series have actually helped me like myself better , as ive understod why I do stuff and to let loose ! My husband said something yeasterday When I asked him about how ive deloped these years We have been together and he said you have become more you and I really like it . Its so cool ,you fight for it and you make me want to do it with you . So Thank you Lauren for providing even more pieces of the puzzle which i felt was wrong , but couldnt put My finger on . ( My mom wanted a sweet girl , in english schoolgirl dresses and a pink ruffled skirt who liked handicrafts and liked to play with Barbie Dolls , that aint me but I still miss her a lot)
I like that you suggest that Mary do a little inner questioning. I don't think Mary realizes that her 'inner you' really is showing. When the t-shirt says 'my dog ate my brain': it is clear she has a sense of humor AND is an intellectual snob. When the shorts are so tight, she can't sit down: that person is too big for her britches AND has an attitude. If the clothes are too dirty: I wonder if her thoughts are keeping her from caring for herself (maybe emotionally or mentally homeless?)
It takes dedication to display a style for longer than a selfie.
It takes courage to display our 'best self' (our loyalty, our truth, our curiosity, our nurturing, our humor, our joy, our innocence, our knowledge), when others are looking. The nice thing is, our best self is always evolving and willing to bring us a rich set of life experiences. So our style can change, as we learn more about ourselves. 😊
Dear Lauren. I love you. I love your combo of snark, humor, and expertise. People are only offended when it strikes an inner chord. If like me for me Mary was truly confident in her approach, your video wouldn't upset her at all. It's because you speak a truth about something they are already bothered by. I'm 5'6", and if someone tried to insult me about being short, I'd look at them like they had 3 heads, bc I'm not short. If they made fun of something I'm insecure about, I would be really defensive.
This is one of my favorites thus far. Lauren thank you for your honesty. Everything your saying is true. I was a like me for me Mary for a couple of years ago b/c of financial difficulty. I’m so glad invest into more pieces I love & make me look my best! I’m continuing to get my act together at the age of 30! Again thank you for your insights.🙃
oh, I know one such Mary, and her name is really Mary... she wouldn't wear this and that and when I said "you need more modern clothes in your wardrobe" she was like "I don't follow fashion, I am not a fashion person..." some deep trauma here, but I just couldn't work with her anymore... I guess I was just inexperienced at that time, now I'll know what to look for. Thanks Lauren!
True! Of course, from the long term horizon, people are going to like or dislike you for YOU. But give them the chance to get to know your real YOU, don't repell them with your slouchy looks and poor first impression wich makes them think (even subconsciously, we can't control it!) that you don't have enough respect neither for you nor for the rest of the people around you. I believe we don't have to be the style icons (we can though! :D ) but "put togetherness" can make wonders. Thank you, Lauren.
ili nel - DTHeart gave some really great tips! For an office-appropriate look in petite sizes, try J Crew, Ann Taylor, and Banana Republic. Also, tuck in your tops (tops should be either shorter/tucked-in, or mid-thigh or longer - nothing that cuts you in half!); try monochrome outfits; dresses and skirts at the knee, or above; high waist slim cut trousers; sleeves 3/4 length, or rolled up; add at least a little heel if you can, but avoid excessively chunky platforms; tailor anything that doesn’t fit perfectly. (I’m 5”0’, pear-shaped)
Duct_Tape Heart can you tell me more about this? I am trying to dress the same way as you and you seem to be really ahead in styling hehe, some tipps would be really appreciated, also, can you make it look not so feminine or sexy (i,g, for work)
Pooja Gurudatt ASOS "petite curve". GAP and Old Navy also carry extended sizes in short length online.
Personally, I'm 5'4 and curvy. A-line shapes and high waistlines are my friend, as are cropped tops/jackets because they actually hit me at the proper length.
Basically, I've learned to emphasize my waist in EVERYTHING!!! I don't buy bulky or loose silhouettes no matter how trendy they are.
Once you know what shapes look good on you, why vere from the path? Even my gym clothes have a recipe lol.
I LOVE IT!
"Like me for me... that's bullshit"
You had me crackin' up this morning!
I need you to come and slap some style sense into me!
(going to check out your style university series!)
Keep droppin' those Truth Bombs, Girl!
Loved the video , all of them. I think all of us have at least one outburst of Mary, Debbie, Ashley Amy, Leslie etc. Important is how we navigate through. This is how we take it with a grain of salt and move on with a smile :-)
I like how you come across. People are too scared to say what they think nowdays. I'm glad you're not.
Would you do an overly comfortable grandma anti-style video? That's the trap I've fallen into. On top of just wanting comfort and not really going places much anymore, I have developed plantar fasciitis from using the leg machine and I can only wear ugly flat shoes, because literally every cute pair I have or have tried on will cause pain, even with my inserts. (That isn't just an old lady problem - I got this at the gym).
I have a similar issue and even cute ballet flats, loafers, and oxfords hurt! My solution is to wear trendy retro trainers (my favorites are vintage-looking New Balance) with my skinny jeans. I elevate that outfit by adding a chic blazer and a good handbag, and maybe a statement necklace or cuff bracelet. Sure, I’d rather wear heels, or cute flats, but it’s not worth having foot surgery! Still looking for something appropriate for dressier occasions that won’t cause pain for days... 😒
+Rara Avis ooh! I am definitely gonna try and recall my high school German and pull up that website, thank you for the tip! Comfort is so important with shoes, and at least basic black boots go with a lot of outfits. Sometimes you can accessorize and diy plain shoes successfully too. Dye them or attach buckles or even spats if you can work them into the outfit. I tend to bohemian so those things appeal to me anyway 😂
I actually found a brand that fits me perfectly in the meantime!
They are called LaShoe, but unfortunately t’s a German shop and they don’t have an English website - or sell anywhere else, it seems.
The shoes are actually meant for people with a Hallux Vagus...but they don’t look like orthopedic shoes or anything, they’re just cut a little wider in front and the leather is more soft and giving than regular shoe leather.
It’s heaven. I already bought 3 pairs and a pair of boots should arrive today!
I also already sold most of my other shoes and boots...it’s heartbreaking, to have to sell 3 or 4 beautiful pieces just to pay for one pair of kindasorta boring looking black boots, but there you go. I wasn’t really wearing any of them anyway, so what’s the point.
I can walk without any discomfort in my new shoes! Yay!
+Rara Avis i know this is 7 months after your comment but i had to reply because I've never met anyone else with the same foot situation as me! I feel your pain! I wind up buying shoes that are too long and still not wide enough. I have had a pair made to fit but omg they look so weird because of the shape they wind up being. I can live with it, it's just a bit of a bummer :(
Cele mai bune oferte si promotii din catalogul Dedeman, valabile de pe 07.12.2017 pana pe 31.12.2017. Reduceri si promotii la: gresie si faianta, produse si unelte pentru gradina, acoperisuri, constructii, termice, scule de mana si electrice, … [Read more. ]
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Bricolajul a ajuns in Romania in urma cu aproximativ 10 ani, insa in Statele Unite si in statele occidentale acest concept este mai vechi, si isi are originile la inceputul anilor ’50. Bricolajul se refera la capacitatea oamenilor de a crea sau repara diverse obiecte fara a apela la ajutor specializat.
Primul catalog de bricolaj pentru renovarea locuintei a aparut in 1968. Acesta a nascut conceptul de bricolaj care sta la baza lanturilor de magazine din zilele noastre. De la covoare si perdele, pana la mobilier si prefabricate, bricolajul se refera la tot ce inseamna renovarea unei locuinte in aceasta acceptiune.
Pe orlo.ro gasesti toate cataloagele de bricolaj, de la cei mai importanti comercianti. Catalog Dedeman, Catalog Praktiker, Catalog Baumax, Catalog Bricostore, Catalog Ambient si altii.
In Romania retelele de magazine pentru bricolaj sau extins rapid, cel mai important comerciant din acest segment este Dedeman, care a pornit din orasul Bacau si a ajuns sa detina magazine in cele mai importante orase din tara.